


The Itsy Bitsy Spider

by Lunatical



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Babysitting, Fluff and Crack, Getting Together, How Do I Tag, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mild Language, Pining, Steve Is a Good Bro, Witch Curses, but also a Sassy Bro, clint is so done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-07 11:09:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11057712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunatical/pseuds/Lunatical
Summary: “What the fuck?” Clint hissed, taking in the scene before them. Bucky would have shared the sentiment, if it hadn’t been for Steve’s elbow sharply poking the archer in his side.“Language, Clint, there’s a kid around.”Clint just kept staring, while Bucky started pointing wildly at Tony.Tony, who was busy getting a juice out of the fridge while talking about weapons to a raptly listening Natasha. The girl was, as they had found out, about four or five years old, and she was currently perched on Tony’s hip, listening to him with pure awe on her face.“That’s cute,” Steve said, completely unhelpful, “she seems to really like Tony.”(Prompt: De-aging fic. Natasha is the one deaged and she takes an immediate liking for Tony. It wouldn’t be that bad if Bucky hadn’t had in mind to woo Tony and the little spider had decided to ruin every of his attempts. Because she’s quite possessive and Tony is hers and hers alone.)





	The Itsy Bitsy Spider

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Feelingsinwinter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Feelingsinwinter/gifts).



“You know, your crush on Tony is really becoming pathetic”

Bucky groaned and hid his face into his pillow, trying and failing to drown out Steve’s incredibly annoying voice. It was way too early for this crap. Way, way too early.

Actually, now that he was thinking about it, it was also too early for Steve to be in his room.

“Hold up, why the hell are you here?” he asked, moving his head just enough to glare at his best friend.

Steve did not seem impressed by his glare -which was extremely rude, he had a very impressive murder face, thank you very much- and the asshole thought to make it even clearer by raising a single, sassy eyebrow at Bucky.

“You mean, why am I here after watching you trip all over yourself because Tony showed up to movie night in a tank top, covered in motor oil from the workshop? The same disheveled look you have once described as – and I quote- “the sexiest fucking thing you have ever seen”? You looked like you were dying when he threw himself on the couch demanding snuggles. Pathetic.”

Bucky debated for a second if sacrificing his pillow to throw it at Steve’s face would be worth the effort, but he really couldn’t be bothered to move his body. Instead, he chose to flop back down, face first, before groaning for a good eight seconds.

He heard Steve chuckle from behind him, and then the bed dipped as he sat beside him. A hand started to pat him on the back, but as comforting as the gesture was, it did little to ease his embarrassment.

Bucky turned around to look sadly towards Steve.

“Why am I so bad at this?”

“I don’t know, Buck…” Steve said, looking sympathetic, “Maybe it’s just because you’re not used to flirt anymore? Also, Tony’s your friend. It must be scary for you, trying to bring things to the next level.”

Bucky let out a pitiful whine, before turning around properly, lying on his back and staring at the ceiling.

“I don’t know what to do” he admitted, looking at Steve again.

“Well, I don’t know either, Buck. But you really need to figure it out because Tony is starting to realize something is wrong” Steve said, patting his shoulder.

Bucky looked at him for a couple of seconds, before burying his face in his hands and letting out a string of seriously impressive curses.

“Ok. Ok.” He straightened up, taking a big breath and puffing his chest. “Today I’ll ask him out, and then I’m gonna start to seriously woo him. Just watch me, I’ll sweep him off his fucking feet, Stevie. I'll seduce the shit outta him. He won’t even know what hit him.”

For a couple seconds, Steve stared in silence at his best friend, who was staring back at him with determination, before collapsing into laughter. Bucky looked affronted for less than three seconds before joining him, and soon they were almost crying on the floor.

After a while, Steve straightened up, wiping his eyes and standing from the bed.

“God, you’re such a dumbass.”

His tone was teasing, and Bucky decided to be mature and not poke his tongue out at him.

Instead, he gave him the middle finger.

“Punk.”

“Jerk.”

“AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!”

Bucky and Steve jumped, caught off guard by the alarm. Steve was out of the room in a second, heading for his shield and uniform, while Bucky started cussing, quickly pulling his clothes off and grabbing his armor.

So much for his plans to ask Tony out.

\---

“A witch. We’re fighting a literal witch. What the fuck.”

“Hawkeye, cut the chatte-”

“She has a _broom,_ Cap. She’s flying on a _fucking broomstick._ Why are our lives like this?”

Bucky snorted and shot down another one of those _things_ the witch kept spawning around her. And “things” was the best way he could describe the mess of claws, tentacles and slime which was currently littering the streets of New York.

As difficult as it was, the Avengers were slowly but surely making their way closer to the witch, with Natasha and Steve being the closest ones, since the rest of the team was either flying or on top of a building: Clint and Bucky were on sniping duty, with Tony, Thor and Hulk doing most of the damage, as the team’s heavy hitters.

Bucky picked off another monster, nodding in thanks when Clint got the one he missed and looking back down on the streets just as Black Widow’s voice came over the comms.

“I managed to reach the witch. Approaching now, cover me.”

Bucky shifted around and adjusted his aim on Natasha, following her movements and killing the few creatures who looked like they were getting too close. He could hear her breathing an “ok” over the comms as she approached the witch, and he focused his attention on her once again.

Natasha sneaked behind the witch, and she had just managed to get close enough to shoot her when the witch turned around, hands glowing.

“Did you think I wouldn’t realize you were there, little human?”

Tony cursed over the comms, and Bucky reflexively tightened his grip on his rifle. That was definitely not good.

“I don’t know, witch. Did you know we’re in New York, and not in Kansas?”

Natasha was mocking the witch.

Judging by the yells over the comms, Bucky wasn’t the only one thinking that was a bad idea. He aimed at the witch, getting ready to shoot even though he knew it would probably be useless. Fucking magic.

The witch snarled, her ugly face twisting and turning green.

“Oh, you dare mock me, little one? Very well, let’s see how you like living inside a fairytale yourself!”

Her fingers started glowing, an ugly green which quickly spread and engulfed her whole body.

There was a flash, and Bucky cursed, letting go of the rifle to cover his eyes.

When the light disappeared, he opened his eyes again to find the witch gone, together with her monsters… and a little girl with bright red hair standing where Natasha was just a second before, Widow’s catsuit pooled around her, barely hanging on one of her shoulders.

“Ahhh, shit,” came Clint’s voice over the comms “that looks bad.”

This time, even Steve’s “language” sounded weak.

\---

The Avengers stood still for a couple of moments, too taken aback to really do anything, before Tony’s voice broke the silence.

“Okay everyone, let’s get our little spider home.”

“Tony, we don’t even know if she remembers us, or if she’s even herself right now. We need to be careful and- “

“Sure, sure. Hey there, little spider,” Ironman exclaimed, landing next to Natasha with a dull thud and completely ignoring Steve’s orders, choosing instead to open up the faceplate and grin at his teammate, “remember me? I bet you do. How about we go home and get you some nice clothes, and maybe let Thor and Brucie-bear get a good look at you?”

Natasha, who had tensed up when he landed, visibly relaxed and shuffled forward, a small smile on her face. Tony quickly walked closer, fearing she would trip on her clothes and fall on her face, so he took out Bruce’s post-hulk-out-blanket from one of his suit’s hidden compartments (he liked to be prepared, ok?) and wrapping it around the girl.

Natasha beamed at him, raising her arms in the universal gesture meaning “pick me up, please”. Tony laughed, a bit startled, but still obliged, bending down to pick her up.

“Sorry, I know the armor is not the best for cuddles, but as soon as we get home I promise I’ll take it off so you can be more comfortable. Are you ok?”

Natasha simply stared at him, her green eyes looking even bigger than usual on her little face. She nodded without saying anything, and threw her little arms around his neck, seemingly happy to let him carry her around.

Tony smiled, delighted, before plopping the faceplate down and securing his hold on the little girl.

“Cap, team, I’m taking Nat home. Well get changed and meet you in the med wing. Thor, try to get Bruce to de-hulk and meet us there. See ya!”

And with that, he blasted off in the direction of the tower, leaving his very confused teammates behind.

\---

“What the fuck?” Clint hissed, taking in the scene before them. Bucky would have shared the sentiment, if it hadn’t been for Steve’s elbow sharply poking the archer in his side.

“Language, Clint, there’s a kid around.”

Bucky turned towards Steve, a mix of confusion and disbelief on his face, while Clint spluttered something about not being on the field, and _that’s not a kid Steve that’s Natasha for fucks sake._

“How are you not,” Bucky started, gesturing vaguely, “I don’t know… surprised? Creeped out?”

Steve shrugged, flushing when he found himself pinned by two pair of disbelieving stares.

“What? It’s not that weird!”

Clint just kept staring, while Bucky started pointing wildly at Tony.

Tony, who was busy getting a juice out of the fridge while talking about weapons to a raptly listening Natasha. The girl was, as they had found out, about four or five years old years old (Bruce wasn’t 100% sure, because she was a pretty small kid, and she had just shrugged when they had asked) and she was currently perched on Tony’s hip, listening to him with pure awe on her face.

“That’s cute,” Steve said, completely unhelpful, “she seems to really like Tony.”

Bucky was about to kick the bastard in the shin, because he could clearly see the little devious smile on his face, but they were all distracted by Tony’s laughter.

They turned around towards the kitchen only to be met with the cutest fucking scene they had ever seen: little Natasha was now on the counter, her legs kicking slightly as she sipped on some apple juice, eyes never leaving Tony as he continued to chatter away about his projects while moving around the kitchen to prepare her something to eat. He paused as he opened a cabinet, turning to look at Natasha.

“Hold on, do you like Nutella?” he asked, scratching his beard, “We have that, we have jam, and also peanut butter if Thor didn’t finish it. So. Which would you prefer?”

Natasha stopped sipping her juice for a second, scrunching her face up while thinking, then she shrugged and pointed at Tony.

“I choose?” he asked, waiting for her to nod before turning back and taking the Nutella out of the cupboard, picking up where he had left off with his rambling.

Steve smiled and backed away, gesturing for Clint and Bucky to follow him. They headed for the elevator, and Steve spoke up just as the doors closed.

“Tony seems to have this under control, and Nat didn’t react too well to us before,” he winced, remembering how Natasha had shuffled behind Tony as the Avengers entered the tower, only allowing Clint, Tony and Bruce near her, “so maybe it’s best to just… leave them be for a while, I think.”

Clint grunted his agreement, but Bucky didn’t answer, too caught up in his thoughts.

How was he going to ask Tony out with Natasha in the way?

He sighed.

His life was a mess.

\---

Tony would be lying if he said that he had expected to be chosen by Natasha as her personal babysitter, but he found out he didn’t really mind. She was a perfect kid, well behaved and absolutely sweet. She was quiet though, and although Thor had confirmed that her memory had been altered by the magic she seemed to partially trust the people she trusted as an adult, which was definitely a relief.

That didn't explain her sudden fondness for Tony, though. The little spider followed him around everywhere he went, which was both flattering and unnerving, because she still hadn’t said a single word since she had been deaged.

Maybe that was why he liked him, because he always kept a steady stream of chatter on his own.

She did usually look for him when she was having one of her bad days and needed a distraction, which he was always happy to provide, but that still didn’t justify the absolute adoration she had for him as a little girl.

Whatever, Thor was in Asgard looking for a solution to fix things, it would be fine.

“Sir,” JARVIS said, snapping Tony out of his focus, “Sergeant Barnes is requesting entrance to the workshop.”

Tony stretched, barely suppressing a whimper when his back protested. As petite as Natasha was, carrying her around for hours was taking its toll on him, and spending hours bent over his workbench wasn’t really helping.

Damn, getting old sucked.

“Sir?”

“Right,” he was zoning out again, _great_ , time for more caffeine. “Let him in, J.”

The door opened and Bucky walked in, carrying a tray with cookies and two cups of what smelled like hot cocoa.

Tony took a second to admire Bucky’s impressive muscles, before smirking at the guy and making grabby hands towards him. Bucky chuckled, putting the tray down on the workbench and passing Tony a cup of cocoa, before sitting down as well.

“Oh, you spoil me, darling.” Tony drawled, letting his voice go deeper than usual.

He accepted the cup, and took a sip to hide his smile when Bucky flushed bright red. Tony had to stifle a laugh as Bucky tried to will his blush down, coughing to hide his embarrassment. He regained his composure quickly, much to Tony's disappointment.

“Bruce made cocoa for everyone so I thought I’d bring it down here for you,” Bucky said after a moment. “There’s a cup for Natasha too, but I don’t think she’ll be drinking it any time soon, huh?” He nodded towards the couch, where Natasha was sleeping, almost completely covered by her blanket, red curls peeking out from underneath.

Tony smiled, shaking his head. “Yeah, she crashed about an hour ago, I think. She was dead tired, poor thing.”

Bucky made a sympathetic noise. “I bet, after all that’s happened to her. How are you holding up, by the way? She seems to have imprinted on you pretty hard”

Tony sighed, sliding down his chair and taking another sip of cocoa. God, having a warm stomach was making him sleepy too.

“It’s been… weird, but good. She still hasn’t spoken though, which is a bit worrying”

Bucky hummed in agreement, but didn’t answer, seemingly lost in thought.

They both remained silent for a couple of seconds, before Bucky cleared his throat.

“So… uh, I- I wanted to ask you something…” Bucky paused, and Tony straightened up immediately, somehow managing to look both worried and excited.

“Sure, what’s up?”

“Right,” Bucky said, feeling even more nervous, “I was just thinking that maybe we could, uh…”

He cut off, trying to find the right words, but both he and Tony were distracted by the sound of sheets shuffling. They turned around to see Natasha sitting up, yawning and scrubbing her eyes. She stopped when he noticed them, brows furrowing as she took notice of Bucky’s presence. She got down from the couch and shuffled towards them, taking her blanket with her.

Still frowning at Bucky, she walked over to Tony and climbed on his lap. The inventor put his cup down to help her get up, and wrapped the blanket around her.

“Did we wake you up, Cappuccetto Rosso?” he asked, with the softest smile Bucky had ever seen on his face.

Natasha simply nodded, slumping against Tony when he started combing his fingers through her (quite impressive) bed hair, trying to gently untangle the knots and turning back towards Bucky.

“Sorry, Robocop, you were saying?”

Bucky opened his mouth to answer but Natasha interrupted him again, tugging at Tony’s shirt.

When he looked down she pouted, and apparently her puppy dog eyes were _heartbreaking, what the hell…_

“Tony,” she said, startling both men, “’m tired.”

Bucky could only watch in wonder as Tony practically melted into a pile of goo, beaming at the little girl and hugging her, looking apologetic.

“You’re right, Nat. We should go to bed, huh?”

She nodded, and Tony got up, throwing a bashful look at Bucky.

“Sorry Buckaroo, maybe next time?”

Bucky nodded, getting up as well, only to stop dead on his tracks not five steps later, because as Tony walked away carrying Natasha, she turned back towards Bucky and stuck her tongue out at him.

\---

“Hey Buck! How’d it go?” Steve asked, looking up from his sketchbook as he heard the elevator door open.

Bucky walked in, looking confused as hell, which was definitely not what Steve was expecting. He frowned when Bucky didn’t answer.

“Is everything all right?”

Steve was sure that Tony would never refuse a date with Bucky. He was totally, absolutely, 100% _certain_ that his two best friends were both in love with each other, but Bucky still wasn’t saying anything.

Steve was starting to contemplate what to do when Bucky slowly licked his lips, still looking confused as hell.

“I think,” he started, frowning a little, “that I’ve just been cockblocked by Natasha. I’m- I’m not sure _why_ , but…” he trailed off, shrugging.

Steve stared. And stared. Even as Bucky frowned at him and waved a hand in front of his face, he simply sat still and stared.

Steve closed his eyes and took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I,” he started, closing his sketchbook and standing up, “will not deal with this madness. If our de-aged coworker wants to stop you from getting some dick, I’m not going to stop her.”

He patted Bucky’s shoulder on his way out.

“You’re on your own, buddy.”

\--

“Hey Tony.”

“Hm? Oh, what’s up, Bucky?”

“I was wondering, if you have the time, would you mind taking a look at my arm? It’s been makin’ this weird noise and I’m kinda worried”

“Sure thing, Buck-o. I’m free now, if you want t- “

He was cut off by a little hand tugging at his sleeve. They both looked at Natasha, who was standing next to Tony.

“Tony,” she said, “ice cream.”

“Oh shoot, that’s right, I promised you a snack, didn’t I? I’m sorry Ragnetto, can it wait until later?”

As it turns out, Black Widow’s face-of-murder is nothing compared to little Nat’s pout-of-despair.

As he watched them leave the workshop one again, Bucky thought about just giving up until she had turned back.

You know, just to spare himself the suffering.

\---

The next time he tried to approach Tony, he was in the kitchen with Natasha. Bucky had been trying to corner him while he was alone, but it was proving to be a difficult task. The little menace was attached to his fucking hip.

“Hey.”

Tony looked up from his coffee, smiling when he saw Bucky.

Before he could even say anything, Natasha yelled “Tony!”

Both men startled, looking towards her just as she exclaimed “Tony, catch!” before _throwing herself off the goddamn fridge_.

The way Tony flung himself towards her would have been comical, if not for the pure terror on his face.

In the end, Bucky had to call Bruce because Tony almost fainted.

 

(Steve’s I’m-disappointed-in-you face did not have any effect at all, but apparently not even Natasha was immune to Pepper Potts and her unimpressed eyebrow.

Thank god for small miracles.)

\---

“Sir. Sir, wake up.”

Tony groaned, trying to turn on his other side, but a weight on his chest was keeping him in place. He opened a bleary eye to see a mess of red hair in front of him. Right. Movie night. Natasha fell asleep? He wasn’t too sure. Meh.

He looked up at the ceiling.

“J, time?”

“It is currently eleven p.m., sir. Sergeant Barnes requested your presence in his quarters. May I suggest leaving little Natasha on this floor? It wouldn’t be good to keep her awake at such hours.”

Tony hummed, way too sleepy to think about the weirdness of Jarvis’ request.

He shuffled around until he managed to free himself from Natasha’s grip and then slipped out, holding his breath in fear of waking her up. When she didn’t stir, he sighed and made his way into the elevator.

He yawned, still sleepy, and wondered why Bucky had called for him. He was starting to feel a bit worried.

Why would Bucky need him at 11pm? Did he have troubles with the arm? He still hadn’t had the chance to take a look at it after last time, after all.

He stepped out of the elevator and definitely did not scream when he found Bucky waiting for him just outside the doors. James looked inside the elevator anxiously, before relaxing when he saw that Tony was alone. He dragged the confused genius behind him, allowing the elevator doors to close.

“Bucky _what the hell are you-“_

“I wanted to talk to you. Alone. Sorry for the, uh, creepiness?”

Tony sighed, noticing how Bucky was shuffling around nervously.

“It’s fine. So, what’s wrong?”

“Actually, uh, nothing’s wrong… I’ve just…” he groaned, steeling himself and looking straight at Tony.

“I wanted to ask you out. On a date. But then little Natasha happened and she kinda kept cockblocking me and Steve refused to help me because he’s an _asshole_ and he was tired of me pining after you. So I- I had to call you here. Which was probably a bad idea because you were worried but I had to ask Jarvis for help and-“

“Woah, ok, slow down, Frosty. You’re rambling, that’s _my_ thing.” Tony shook his head, smiling softly. “And yes, by the way.”

Bucky stilled, looking hopeful.

“Yes?”

Tony huffed, taking Bucky’s hand and intertwining their fingers together.

“Yes, I will go on a date with you.” He smiled and kissed the back of Bucky’s hand, grinning when that made him blush, and then added: “I was actually going to ask you out before this whole mess started.”

Bucky smiled, still looking a bit red, and took a step closer.

“Really?” he asked, biting his lower lip.

Tony found himself looking at Bucky’s lips, and once he did he couldn’t manage to look away. He hummed, nodding slightly, and stepped even closer to Bucky, until there was barely any space left between them.

Bucky placed his metal hand on the back of Tony’s neck and he felt him shiver at the cold touch, his breath ghosting over his lips.

“Can I kiss you?” Bucky asked, his voice barely a whisper.

Instead of answering, Tony closed his eyes and tilted his head up. Bucky leaned down, closing his eyes as well, and brought their lips together.

Their kiss was slow and sweet and _perfect_ and Bucky almost lost himself in it…

Almost, because Jarvis interrupted them, startling them both enough to make them jump apart.

“Avengers, attention. I have the pleasure to inform you that Agent Romanov has turned back to her normal age, and seems to be in perfectly healthy conditions.”

“Oh thank _God_ ” came Bruce’s voice, sounding sleepy but relieved, followed by a few grunts of agreement ~~which were definitely Clint’s~~.

“Thank you, guys,” Natasha sounded amused, her smile audible in her voice, “but if the magic didn’t mess with my memories, we should be really thanking Tony and Bucky for getting their heads out of their asses.”

Silence stretched for a while, the team’s general confusion almost palpable through the intercom.

“What?” asked Steve, his voice sounding scruffier than usual.

“The curse,” Natasha explained, “they broke the curse with a kiss. I don’t know why, but the witch built the fairytale around them… I was convinced that Tony was somewhat of a princess and Bucky was trying to steal him from me. I don’t know _why_ , I just knew that I didn’t want them to kiss, which I’m guessing they did now. Congratulations, by the way. It was about fucking time.”

Again, silence, before Tony started giggling. In a few seconds he was laughing so hard he had to hide his face in Bucky’s chest to try to muffle the sound, but that only had the effect of making Bucky laugh as well, and before they knew it the entire team was losing it.

 

And as Bucky was laughing he looked down and saw Tony, smiling with his head on Bucky’s chest, and he couldn’t help the way his heart fluttered and swelled with love.

He knew that if he got to see that smile for the rest of his life, he could die happy.

\---

 

“Fuck, hold on, guys! How are we gonna tell Thor?!”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, so this is it!
> 
> Thank you for reading, and thank you @Kellen for the amazing prompts! I hope you like your gift <3  
> Honestly this whole fic went into a totally different direction than what i had planned, but I'm still quite satisfied with how it turned out.  
> Also, Tony is really italian in this sorry.
> 
> Translations for the italian:  
> Cappuccetto Rosso= Little Red Riding Hood  
> Ragnetto= Little spider
> 
>  
> 
> The fic is currently un-beta'd, so if you find any mistakes please let me now!


End file.
